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Monday, April 25, 2005

Spare Bedroom=Empty Space

Tonight as I sat in the hall while the Princess fought her "poop poop battle"--I stared into our "new guest room", this is our upstairs spare bedroom that until last weekend was like a giant closet, a catch all room so speak, when we bought a 4 bedroom house the intent was to fill it with babies, we already had 1 and definately wanted more, still do. Never did anything to this room, because we figured why bother, it's going to be a nursery. About 2 months ago this was confirmed, a positive BETA, 2 1/2 weeks ago those hopes were dashed. We put a twin bed and a night table in there the weekend before my scheduled D & C as not to be a reminded that indeed that on or around 11/30 of this year, our DD Princesses birthday, a date not hard to forget when your first born celebrates her day, will not be a nursery. I still have high hopes of being pregnant again, hopefully before that, yet it seems nothing that I can put in there takes away the vision I had planned for this years holidays, this spare bedroom no matter what is in there still seems an empty place, along with an empty place in my heart.


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